Hourly care 4 times per day

I have put this off for a few days as I wasn’t sure how to approach it but now realise that, like the Bankes’ children, I’m really writing a “Mary Poppins” letter.

We are:

David, aged 81, just recovering from a second hip replacement, so on crutches and in a wheelchair but still retaining most of my wits.

Brenda, aged 77, with severe Alzheimer’s, doubly incontinent, very agitated and confused but physically able, and desperate for, walks.

Brenda has had a wonderful carer, Jacqui, for a few years. This started when we were in Swanage and when we moved to Poundbury in February Jacqui agreed to follow us for a while to provide continuity. However, practically this meant that she could only make one visit per day and this was only ever on weekdays. Jacqui is paid out of Direct Payments

I was able to cover weekends and pad changes in afternoons and evenings. This was until my hip got too bad when Dorset supplemented Jacqui with a carer every evening and weekend mornings.

I have now been assessed in my own right and Jacqui is finding the travelling too much.

So, we seek,from 1st September, care something like :

* Morning to bathe and dress Brenda.

* After which a couple of hours or so of personal assistance, including taking us for walks, ironing, bedmaking etc.

* Continuing into a lunchtime session for Brenda’s hygiene and perhaps some help with food.

*Then a teatime session for Brenda’s hygiene and perhaps some help with food.

*Finally, an evening hygiene session to get her ready for bed.

If it was more practical to attach the personal assistance in-between lunch and teatime rather than morning and lunchtime that should be OK.

What we have learned is that the carer:

*Should speak good English in a soft tone (This is not a racist thing as a strong e.g. Geordie accent might also prove a problem and too strident a tone, however well meaning, can frighten her.)

*Should obviously have a caring nature, be able to strike up a rapport with Brenda and not just be a box ticker.

Be happy for walks and strong enough to push me in a wheelchair (I’m 100 kg) until I’m back walking, although I’m hoping that will be by September anyway.

We are in a first floor flat off Queen Mother Square with a bathroom/WC and Shower Room/WC and a lift to the first floor.

No doubt you’ll need further information so apologies for what I’ve missed.

David Drury